So last night I spent the evening with a guy friend of mine I know from the rooms. He has a few years more sobriety than me. He’s got his shit together, which is probably why I do spend time with him (aka stick with the winners).
We took a drive in the new jeep he recently bought. He’s also started a new (more successful) career this year and things were really turning around for him. I was happy for him.
Anyhew we were catching up etc and asked him how his dating life had been going. He explained “I went out with this girl a few times. Friend of a friend, not in the rooms. But I don’t’ think there’s anything there.” I could hear the disappointment in his voice.
Feeling badly for him and trying to encourage optimism I asked him to explain the flaw. “Well” he said “Two out of the four times we hung out she got totally wasted.” So me again trying to see the silver lining said “How bad was it?” He said it was so bad she apologized. So bad she passed out.
Oh boy. I’ve been there done that. Right before I came into the rooms infact. One of the bottoms I hit was passing out in my dates’ car, on a first date. I couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror after that. I didn’t like who I was becoming and worse…….there was a witness to my actions. And that look he gave me I’ll never forget it. It was a look of disgust.
Anyhew getting back to my friend and his situation. It got me to thinking and wondering about the people who we are attracted to and who are attracted to us.
When I came into the rooms it was through a date ALREADY in the rooms who influenced me. And here my friend was with a girl who was (apparently battling her own alcohol-fueled demons) and attracted to someone in recovery.
I wondering how likely are we to mainly attract like minds?
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